Orphan Care | Wide Awake Family

A Christmas Wish: Meet Boris and Vladik

Posted on December 25, 2014 by kimnjed

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

We are having a cozy day at home, just the six of us. We’re cuddling in, eating yummy food, playing with toys,sipping coffee. It’s perfect.

Today, on this glorious day, I have just one Christmas wish. Today I have a wish that all of our Boys at Romaniv would be truly seen. I have a wish that they would be seen by many as the beautiful souls that they are.

When I first met our Boys all I could see was their outward appearance. I saw the filth, the snot, the vomit, the disabilities, the deformities. I smelled the stench. My ears were full of the awkward noises. I knew God had called us to give our lives to these Boys, so I prayed that He would help me to see/smell/hear past all that.

And He did!

That was then. Now, when I see our Boys I see Boris, Slavik, Yaroslav, Misha, Valera, Orhan, Irakli, Ivan, Dima, Andrei, Seriozha, Vova, Zhenya, Vitya, Vladik, Ilya, and Danya. I see friends. I see my babies. I see my treasures. When I hear the awkward noises they mean something to me. They are cries of joy or yells of anger or first babbles or moments of sadness and pain. They are not inappropriate noises now. They are communication. They are voices I love. I’m not gonna lie, I still smell the stench 🙂 Hehe…I’m only human…that’s for stinkin’ sure. (pun intended)

My Christmas wish is that today you, and many many more will see our Boys as individuals worthy of dignity and love. I know that if people will really look- past the differences and into the eyes, they will see. They will see our Boys as they were meant to be seen; as children of God.

And if you really see, then you will never be the same. I’m changed forever for having known them.

So, will you take a Christmas moment and meet my friends? You won’t be sorry. 🙂

Swiss Shock and Awe

Posted on December 4, 2014 by kimnjed

Welcome December! How did that happen? November was like two seconds long. I was planning to do a Thanksgiving post, but then we lost electricity for 5 days, and then we had Thanksgiving, and then the next day Addy and left for Switzerland!

I have a lot to be thankful for. Even more so after this weekend. Oh God, why are you so good to us??? Wow.

I might have told you before about our Switzerland connection, but just in case I didn't, or you forgot, I'll sum it up real quick like.

Many moons ago, in my former American life, I loved a little boy in Ukraine. My friends and I desperately wanted to find this little boy a family because he resided in an institution much like Romaniv and we knew he needed out. A few friends and I decided we would organize a day dedicated to this precious boy (who now lives with a wonderful family in Texas!!!) and try to get as many people fundraising for him on one day as we could. Adoption is expensive and many times if the money obstacle is removed, it makes adoption more possible.

Well, as we were fundraising in Oregon a woman in Switzerland, Sandra, contacted me by email and told me that she too was fundraising for the very same boy! She desperately prayed that he would find a family, and our friendship grew as we advocated for our sweet boy.

Once we knew we were moving to Ukraine, Sandra chimed in and said if we ever made it over to Switzerland we should share at her church in Lucerne. We highly doubted we would make it to Switzerland, but thought the gesture was nice. Well, God knew better. It turned out that last January we needed to go to Switzerland to get our Ukrainian visas and we got to visit Sandra, her family, and her church.

The International Church of Lucerne embraced right from the get-go. They fell in love with our Boys and God broke their hearts. They began to support us in prayer and with some finances. I can not express to you how warm and loving is this awesome community of believers. They are the real deal and I can't believe we get the honor to partner with them.

Jed went to Switzerland in September for a family wedding and got to visit our friends in Lucerne. He told them of our need for a van to transport volunteers to and from Romaniv, and right there on the spot they decided to do a Thanksgiving fundraiser to buy a van for Wide Awake. Awesome.

So, this past weekend was the fundraiser and holy moly, I guess I set my expectations just a wee bit too low. God blew my itty bitty expectations out of the water. What a generous, loving, beautiful community we found in the International Church of Lucerne. In one weekend they donated thousands of Swiss Francs. THOUSANDS. Those thousands, in addition to gifts from their body given to Jed in September will buy us a van. Need met in an instant.

Blown away, humbled, joyful, tearful, THANKFUL.

Jed kinda kicked me out the door by sending me on this trip to Switzerland. He knew I needed a breather and a time of refreshment for my spirit. I felt nervous, and unsure, but excited to go. I brought Addy with me, and thought if nothing else it would be a special time for the two of us together.

It was that, and so much more.

Many of you have donated and donated and donated to this cause. Many people have given thousands of dollars to help improve the lives of our Boys. Many people gave before we moved, and many more people have given since. We are thankful for every single cent, and for every single bit of love that goes along with the cents. THANK YOU!! Because of the distance, all that communicating and giving is done online. Yay for internet! This was different though, because this was the first time I had seen a group of people, in the flesh, get behind this cause and get behind our Boys like this since we moved to Ukraine. It's different now that our Boys aren't just an idea or a passion. They are our friends and our loved ones. When I share about them now it's with a knowing that comes from hours spent together. Watching strangers work hard to prepare and then pull off an event like this just for our Boys, after really knowing our Boys is a whole new ballgame.

I just sat there, watching pies being auctioned off for my Boys and tears filled my eyes. How is God so good? How is it that He cares so much about our Boys and about us that He put it in the hearts of people thousands of miles away to give so generously and selflessly?

I wish so bad I could tell our Boys how much they are loved from afar. As I sat in that room on Friday night I wondered what each of the Boys would think and feel if they were surrounded by as much love as I was that night. I felt so honored, so loved- to overflowing. My spirit didn't see that coming. 🙂

To the International Church of Lucerne- your love and care for our family and our Boys is absolutely amazing. You tell us that you love and you care, and we believe it. Not just because of the money (which of course we couldn't appreciate more!) but because of your warm hearts and open arms. Your love is evident on your faces and we are just so thankful that God has brought our lives together. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for every bit of generosity poured out last weekend and in the months since we met. You have made a difference.

So, there's my Thanksgiving post. I'm not sure I've ever had a Thanksgiving where it hit home more. Praise God, it's time to go van shopping!! Yeehaw!

PS: Addy and I also got to spend some very special time with family. Brett and Rachel just got married and it was such a joy to be with them. Serious balm for my soul. Brett and Rachel, we love you and are so proud of you. Addy and I loved and savored every single minute with you. Ukraine is waiting for you!!! 😉

The Most Important Post

Posted on November 19, 2014 by kimnjed

November is a good month. We have two family birthdays, it’s Thanksgiving, the holiday season begins, the weather is cozy, and it’s National Adoption Month! Did you know? Have you heard? There is a whole month designated for sharing about the plight of orphans and the blessing of adoption. Yep, that sounds just about perfect to me.

We’ve been sitting on some important information for a few months now, considering how, when, and where we would share our hearts. Well, now is the time and here is the place. After all, it is National Adoption Month!

With a bit of fear and trembling I’m going to share, and then I’m going to ask you to prayerfully respond. There are many different great responses, and your response will likely be different than mine. For the sake of our Boys, every response is important.

The work we do, and Mission to Ukraine has done for many years at Romaniv is important and necessary. It is life-altering for our Boys. Boys who were once strangers that flinched at touch and cowered from any human interaction are now dear loved ones who come scooting and crawling and hobbling as soon as they hear our voices. One boy who used to avoid eye contact at all cost now seeks out our gaze and will sit forehead to forehead with Jed as the guitar is played- just looking into Jed’s eyes. No words, just a look. It is enough for us to see that God is doing miracles.

And yet.

No work we do could ever be more beneficial than a family.

No treatment could ever be as effective as the love of a family.

No weighted vest could be more comforting than a mother’s arms.

No helmet could offer better protection than a father’s embrace.

This work we do is a stopgap. It is the next best thing possible in this situation. But it is not a family, and it is not nearly enough. There is no future for our Boys here. Even if our dreams come true and we build group homes where they can be loved and cared for, it still won’t hold a candle to a life spent as part of a loving family. There are nannies at Romaniv that do care for the Boys deeply, but they face an impossible task. How can 2 nannies care for more than 20 boys with severe disabilities and do an even satisfactory job?

Most of the boys and men at Romaniv are not legally free to be adopted. Either their parents still maintain their parental rights, or the boys are over the age of 18 which prevents them from being adopted. To those boys and men we commit to doing whatever we possibly can to love them, care for them, and give them a future worth living until they day they are made whole in heaven.

Some of our Boys, though, ARE available for international adoption. We haven’t shared this with you before for several reasons that might be hard to understand. There are many layers to this. We feel protective of our Boys and the work that is being done; we want to avoid any exploitation; we have a relationship to maintain with the orphanage directors that requires vigilant care. Nothing about this is simple, so we tread lightly with steps full of prayer. And yet, one of our Boys is not thriving. He is wasting away before our eyes and we can’t stand by and watch without acting. He is ill and will never thrive in an institutional setting. He needs the best medical care. He needs a nutrition plan. He needs therapy of all kind. Most of all he needs a mommy and daddy to love him as their son- to believe in him, to fight for him and shower him with affection. We are compelled to act and we can’t hold off any longer. Time is of the essence.

So I’m asking that you see our Boys. I’m asking that you stop and see them for the treasures they are. See their immense value. See their precious beauty. Consider their lives as weighty as your own and ask the Lord how you should respond to this knowledge that some of them are waiting for families. If you follow Jesus you are called to care for the orphan in some way. Even if you don’t believe in Jesus I bet you can agree that this is a justice issue that can not be ignored.

“Learn to do right; seek justice.
Defend the oppressed.
Take up the cause of the fatherless;
plead the case of the widow.” Isaiah 1:17

Maybe you are supposed to pray. A million times thank you! Prayer is important and essential. Any of the progress that’s been made has only come through the power of the Holy Spirit. Our Boys need prayer!

Maybe you are supposed to give financially to help improve the quality of life for our Boys. Yes! Thank you so very much! None of this would even be happening if we didn’t have faithful financial supporters on the team.

Maybe you are supposed to adopt. Please don’t dismiss this response. I am confident that some of you who read this are called to respond through adoption. Children were made for families! Children were not made for institutions. One hour spent at Romaniv will prove that point. I must warn you though that any romanticism concerning the adoption of one of our Boys ends with the fuzzy feelings you may be feeling as you read this post. It will not be romantic. It will be a hard road and much faith will be required. But- it will be a road worth walking. I am confident of that. Orphans are very important to our God and He has gone to great lengths to prove His love for these particular Boys. He will not allow the world to forget them now, and He’s not about to forget them when they step out of Romaniv’s gates.

I was with these Boys yesterday. I held them in my arms. I kissed their cheeks. I held their hands so they wouldn’t harm themselves. They are real people. They were created with purpose and God has good plans for them. I can’t even imagine one of my four children living like our Boys. I can’t imagine my Ezra, nearly 9 years old but the size of a toddler, sitting day after day rocking back and forth in his bed. I can’t imagine him sitting and sitting and waiting and waiting for his life to begin. I can’t imagine not going to him and taking him out of that place. Our Boys are as real as Ezra and they are as deserving of love as he. They were created with just as much purpose and intentionality. They were created in the image of God and God does not make mistakes.

There you have it. Now you know, and I now I humbly ask you to respond. I ask you to stop and pray and ask the Lord what He would have you to do. Please pray that adoptive families would step out with boldness and faith. Any serious inquiries can be emailed to kjohnson@wideawakeinternational.org and I would be happy to talk with you more. If you have questions about what adopting an institutionalized child looks like in real life I can connect you with adoptive parents who have walked that path.

Please share this post and give our Boys a voice this month. Thank you!

“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute.” Proverbs 31:8

(God’s) Timing is Everything

Posted on October 6, 2014 by kimnjed

So yesterday was basically amazing.

We had the extreme honor and pleasure of meeting with a woman in Kyiv who has worked for twenty years to provide rights for, and secure the rights of people with disabilities. She and her team have worked tirelessly to rewrite laws and create legislation and lobby for the ones we love. This incredible woman was fighting for our Boys before we even had a clue they existed. This incredible woman deserves a standing ovation.

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As a mother of an adult son with disabilities she recognized the holes in the social system of Ukraine. She saw how her own son would fall between those cracks. She knew the value of his life and decided to do something about it.

As Ukraine attempts to move toward European Standards of Care for institutionalized children and adults it has become obvious that the current model of care can not continue “as is”. Major overhauls must happen. Major change must come. And it will have to be MAJOR.

Before we moved here we told people that the whole social system here in Ukraine would have to change in order for the dreams God has given us to come about. We dream of community living for people of all abilities where they are not isolated, but are active members of society. We dream of homes where children are not confined to their beds, but they are truly living and thriving, surrounded by loving support for all their days. Those dreams are legally impossible with the current system. BUT, change is coming. We don’t know when (but we do know it will be soon), we don’t now how, but now we know the people who have been dreaming this dream long before we arrived.

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Timing is everything. The harvest is so ripe. How can we honor those who have gone before us? How can we thank them enough for their tireless, unrecognized efforts? It’s truly humbling and so encouraging! I mean, think about this: we knew at some point we would have to hire a legal team to dig in to, and fight to change the laws here concerning people with disabilities. Then yesterday we learned that there are people here already doing that- and with much success!

There is much, much work to be done, and many battles yet to be fought, but we are not alone. We are a teeny-tiny piece of a great big puzzle here in Ukraine. There are others who care, and it is personal to them. We met one of them yesterday.

I’m a concrete thinker. I like to know what to do next. All these policies and plans and multi-year projects are nearly impossible for me to wrap my brain around. But, in our meeting we were given a solid next step to work toward. We learned that it is important to register Wide Awake International as an NGO here in Ukraine. That will be to our benefit once the big changes start to take place. So, we’ll get working on that right away.

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In the meantime we’ll keep in touch with our new contact in Kyiv, and faithfully serve the Boys God has put right in front of us. It’s more and more obvious as time goes by that this is the exact place we are supposed to be at this exact time in history. Because of that we can rest. Even though Ukraine is at war and the task before us seems insurmountable, we can be confident that God is truly in control. Yay for that!!!! Thank you all for your continued prayers and support. You are making a difference in many lives!

The photos are from last week at Romaniv. Little Ilya was cracking us up with his absolute love for music. It really helps him to regulate. He even tried to climb inside the guitar! Don’t miss him on Jed’s lap in the pics. Hilarious and awesome.

Beginnings

Posted on June 3, 2011 by kimnjed

Beginning…beginning of what? That’s a good question. The beginning of this blog, yes, but I had hoped today I would be starting this blog out with talking about the beginning of our adoption journey to kiddo #5. Although things won’t look how I thought they would, I guess technically this is still about the beginning of our adoption journey. Nice rambling start eh? 🙂

I’ll back up. Who are we?
I’m Kim: wife, Mommy, foster mom, home-school teacher, friend, pediatric nurse, coffee snob, lover of all things missions/orphans/helpless/least of these. I’m passionate about the plight of the orphan, both here, and abroad. My husband tells me my passion is “to mother the world”. He may not be that far off!
Then there’s Jed: husband, Daddy, foster dad, friend, social worker, guitar-playin worshippin’ Jesus Freak. He is my best friend and an amazing person. He is selfless and totally committed to pursuing God’s plans and purposes.
Adelina: our oldest daughter, our amazing firstborn. She loves to read and read and read. She is mildly obsessed with Ancient Egypt. Ha! Addie is kind, loves and lives life to the fullest with a perpetual smile on her face.
Ezra: our first son, our “helper”. Ezra loves to color, cuddle mommy, and jump on the trampoline. He adores his older sister (though he would never admit that to anyone). He is loving and tender, always the one to rush to kiss the babies.
Havalah: our joy. The name Havalah means “life”, and she is perfectly suited for her name. Havalah is a bubbly ball of sweetness that you just can’t help but squeeze. She knows what she wants and will let you know it! She is our Polly Pocket and Strawberry Shortcake girl.
Baby “S”: our unexpected miracle. S is our foster baby boy that we have had since his birth. We didn’t expect to keep him when we took him in, but now we can’t imagine our lives without him. He will be one year old on Saturday and what a celebration that will be! I’ll share another time the miracle that is our baby. We are in the process of adopting him through our state. He is happy, beautiful, and absolutely adored.

We created this blog because we recently committed to a little boy through Reeces Rainbow. They suggest you start a blog for your adoption journey. I actually found out about Reeces Rainbow through another blog. I read on that blog about the plight of special needs orphans and was compelled to act. After much prayer we knew God was calling us to pursue a certain boy. I dreamed about him, prayed for him, God spoke, words were given, Scriptures were given, money was given! It was very very clear to us that God was saying “Move!” So we moved. We sent in our committment papers and then today we found out that another family who was in country already had decided to adopt our boy. It was a rare occurence and everyone involved was surprised at the turn of events. We were shocked! What do you do when you know beyond a shadow of doubt what God told you to do, but then things change so radically? What do we make of it? It’s confusing and heartbreaking. When we committed to that boy I felt the feelings you feel when you find out your pregnant, and now I’m not sure what to feel since my “baby” is no longer mine. I know legally he never was mine, but in my heart he was. 🙂

So, now we wait on the Lord. He told us to move, so we will continue to move forward. We will continue our home study paperwork and see where He leads. I decided to start the blog anyhow, because even though the course of our journey has changed, I know it has not ended. It is still the story of our adoptions of #4 and #5. Your guess is as good as mine on how things will turn out! God knows though, may His kingdom come and His will be done. So be it!